Siblings!
I am lucky enough to have siblings! Two to be exact. An older brother and an older sister, yes, I am the youngest. There is much to be read about birth order and so many other things related to having siblings. I have to say, I feel so blessed to have someone who grew up in the same home, knew the same parents and have memories to share.
When I decided to have children of my own, I prayed I would be able to give the gift of siblings to my children. Though in high school, I was voted least likely to have children - due to my desire for a career, I have five funny, smart, beautiful children. AND they have each other and truly like each other.
My sister and I shared a bedroom most of our childhood. We did not ALWAYS get along. There were TIMES that we did though being 15 months apart, we traveled through messing, clean, sleep deprived and energy abound at different TIMES. I will say, I never felt hated by my sister, I certainly did not hate her. As we grew up, we found more and more similarities and once we had children, we became best friends again. I would not want to travel this life without her.
I raised my five to “get along”! I allowed disagreements, discussions, arguments and even allowed a little bullying in my home. Learning from each other how things feel certainly allowed for empathy and compassion for others. They learned how to treat each other and their friends. I was most ALWAYS within ear shot and wanted them to have the pleasure of testing life with those that love them the most. There were certainly things done that I was unaware of, there were certainly things I would not have said were okay. We as parents cannot be everywhere all the time. I had no unrealistic expectations about them ALWAYS liking each other and getting along perfectly.
My Fab Five on our Scotland vacation 2016
There were some guidelines set along the way - spoken and unspoken. There were lots of discussions and conversations about how we treat each other.
I found an article the other day with what you can tell your children to be better siblings…
-Create Edu FB Page
“You don’t have to agree, but you do have to respect each other.”
“Sometimes you need a break from each other, and that’s ok.”
“Friends will come and go, but siblings are for life.”
“Fair doesn’t mean equal. Everyone gets what they need.”
“Be the sibling you’d want to have.”
“Family is your safe place - make it feel that way.”
I have heard mySELF say similar things to my children, and now hear my children talk about their children and how they interact.
Your home is your children’s laboratory. Let them learn how to be. When children have the blessing of each other, allow them to learn how to treat each other and others in their life.
